Gout started at 23 and I am now 34. I am pissing in bottles to analyze the colour of my piss for medical reasons.

So the funny thing about GOUT is that people actually blame you for it. Then you become ashamed of it like it's all your fault. Which I guess it can be when you eat the great tasting stuff. What kind of hell is this, whatever tastes good will punish you with the pain of gout? Great, that's a life looking forward to. So in my 20's I made above average income compared to my friends and I had a wasteful decade eating in the most expensive restaurants and drinking the most expensive wines and scotch. My first GOUT attacks weren't even in my foot. It would be soreness in my spine and sometimes a pinched nerve in my upper shoulder which would stiffen my neck, where it would be hard for me to look downward, so I would walk around like a stiff neck. Sometimes, the pain would be so bad I couldn't get out of bed and just stayed there all day, and called into work sick. I knew it had something to do with drinking but never thought it was gout, so I moderated my wines a little bit. After a week or two things would get back to normal. This would come back maybe 3-4 times a year. Then when I was 31 it started to really get bad. I would have 5-6 gout attacks per year, again all after nights of drinking. I then turned into a vegetarian started following all the advice I found on the internet. I even took some medication subscribed by my doctor, but those drugs made me crazy, literally. I actually know how it may feel to be an insane person. I had an "insane" attack after work one day on these gout drugs, and when I was driving home I was hallucinating. It was so bad I left a voice message to my loved ones that if I didn't make it I loved them. So I had to stop those drugs.


For the last 2 years I have been watching what I drank and ate, and if the alcohol would start to make me feel sore again I would drench my system with water, especially at night. Maybe even 4 water bottles per night, waking myself up. I would be doing crazy stuff, like pissing in the empty water bottles, so I can analyze the colour and quantity of my urine. If the piss was deep yellow, I would down another bottle, and hopefully the next pissing round the colour would get closer to white. I started to feel like Howard Hughes, who was also known to piss in bottles. I guess I started pissing in bottles because it was either too painful to get up to go to the washroom, or I was pissing so much that I didn't want to lose too much sleep, as it is convenient to just let it rip in a bottle then to run out and do it like normal humans. : ) Anyway I sound crazy to all of you, but I am actually a normal looking professional, separated marriage with 2 kids and making above average income, but I piss in bottles and have gout in my 30's. So I am just sharing this, as there really isn't no one else I can tell this stuff too as it is just disgusting.

Comments for Gout started at 23 and I am now 34. I am pissing in bottles to analyze the colour of my piss for medical reasons.

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Jun 05, 2013
Gout and your medication
by: Frank

Dear Bob,

If you are taking medication for your gout, make sure you are taking the pills on a full stomach. It sounds like you havent enough food in your stomach , hence you are having bowel problems. If you are reacting so bad to the medication then you should see another doctor and change your gout meds, as it seems there will be some long term side effects on your health taking what you are taking now.

Jun 05, 2013
Gout and side effects from pills
by: Bob

I am 46 and have probably had gout since early 20's
Having a incompetent doctor didn't help,
I have another bout with gout. Again in my big toes, hand and neck , also my crotch hurts now .
Problem I'm having is medication I take for it gives me the shits Big Time !
Today I shit my brains out at least 20 times
Stomach cramps , and from wiping my ass 40 times my butt hole is bleeding ,
This medication is terrible .

Jan 27, 2013
Desperate Times
by: Marc

Oh gents I'm reading this in the middle of my joint worst attack ever... The previous worst was in my big toe but I didn't know it was gout so I carried on drinking nightly to dull the pain. Big mistake.

Anyway the gout has went all round my left foot, top of, big toe and ankle which was bad enough. It was on the mend but now my OTHER foot has started! I'm cruising round the house like the human fucking centipede but managing to piss by kneeling at the bowl! Now to top the lot I need a shit. So I ask you, apart from shitting myself what do I do? How the fuck do I get on that throne?? I can't ask my 5'5 delicate wife and 2 sons aged 4+8 to put my 15 stone frame on it, imagine what they'd remember there dad for?!
Should I ring the fire brigade and tell them I need shit?

Wish me luck...

Oct 24, 2011
Me too
by: Anonymous

Im 26 now, my first attack happened when I was 23. Having a attack right now and just found out it was gout the other day...thought it was tendinitis. Anyway, I piss in empty water bottles as well and also look to see what color it is...just to make sure I am taking in enough water - and it really is SO much easier than to try to get to the bathroom.

I have also noticed that it is moving around in my foot...It starts on the left side of my left foot - then went to the arch - now its more in my ankle. I am using crutches to try to move around better, taking pain pills, and about to ask my doctor for more Colchicine - really seemed like it helped when I tried it for 4 days. Made it so much less pain.

Jan 27, 2011
Pissing Gout
by: FeelUrPain

I am pissing my pants reading this...hilarious. But, not really. I am 32 and have had gout since 26, so I feel your pain. Sadly, I'm wondering if it's moving to my spine (that's how I found this blog).

I've had the same pinched nerve feeling between my left shoulder blade/spine for over a month now - some mornings it feels like that part of my spine is on fire...and I can't turn my head to the left.

I tried massages, which offered slight, temporary relief. I tried fancy 100% absorption vitamins (Eniva BIOchlor) which is basically liquid chlorophyll that contains 4x the recommended daily vegetable requirement...the only thing that really helps is to eliminate alcohol from your diet - with the exception of maybe ONE or TWO drinks per weekend night. If that's not an option, from one gout-er to the next...you're fucked.

I hope my spine is not getting infected with this shit!

Jan 02, 2010
gout after wine
by: Anonymous

Try wines with no preservatives in them.

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